Nesting is a practice where divorced or separated parents take turns living with their children in the family home. By switching living situations with each other on a regular schedule rather than forcing the children to travel between different habitations, they offer their children the security and stability of a familiar home and undisrupted former routine.
This can help ease the period of adjustment after a divorce. However, nesting is not a suitable fit for every family, and each one needs to consider certain factors before deciding to do it.
Financial feasibility
Can the parents support three households, one for each parent as well as the family home? Maintaining a single household can be difficult even on two incomes. The children’s age and maturity also factor in. Older children may not need the arrangement or may need it for less time, reducing the cost. Younger children may need it for longer, which means having to maintain the three households longer.
Demands of life
Life often brings unavoidable or unexpected changes. Certain jobs require considerable travel or may simply force one parent to move completely to keep the job or for advancement purposes. Remarriage may also interfere with a nesting situation. A new family or the need to move makes it difficult to maintain.
Children can have a difficult time after divorce because their lives become so different through no fault of their own, and they have so little power to control any of the changes thrust on them. Nesting offers a cushion to soften the flow of change, a source of continuity in what may feel to them like a very unstable world.
